Team lead Eva reflects on the moment she knew palliative care nursing was for her. It was the realisation that you have only one chance to get it right for each person in your care that’s dying, that drove Eva Trowers’ passion to become a specialist palliative care nurse.
Twelve years after joining St Christopher’s after a long period as a district nurse, Eva, is now a Clinical Team Lead, managing a team of nine that looks after 250 patients in the community in Bromley, and none of that passion has worn off. If anything, it’s grown.
“I just love going out in the community. There’s something so special for me about looking after people in their own homes, in their environment and on their terms.
“Sometimes you have to stop and pause because it’s such a profound moment in people’s lives. Knowing that each and every one of us will come to the end of life at some point, it’s so very special if you can get it right – make it a better death so that it leaves a better legacy.”
“I really appreciate the amazing teamwork that goes into providing end of life care.”
Eva had set out wanting to make a difference to people at another significant life moment – as a midwife.
“I think there are similarities between the beginning and end of life and then I did my nurse training and was drawn to working in the community.”
Caring for people nearing the end of life was the exclusive responsibility of the senior district nurses when Eva started out.
Then, as soon as she became a Sister and first encountered patients at that stage of life, there was an almost immediate connection.
“There was this woman who I was visiting. I was so keen to get it right for her and at the same time so anxious not to do her a disservice. I remember turning her over, she held me, and I held her and she said she felt safe. That was the turning point. From that moment, my heart was in palliative care.”
It took another few years before Eva made the move to St Christopher’s and she admits that the first year or so working as a Clinical Nurse Specialist in the community was more challenging than she’d anticipated.
“I might have been a bit naïve about the level of clinical autonomy you take on with the role. It was only then I realised quite how skilful specialist palliative care nurses are. I really appreciate the amazing teamwork that goes into providing end of life care – with our colleagues in district nursing as well as all the Allied Health Professionals in the team here at St Christopher’s.”
Now, in her managerial role, Eva is able to coach, model and mentor as well as maintain face-to-face contact with patients. Even with all her experience, Eva says she retains some of those early self-doubts.
“You never lose some of those vulnerabilities, that feeling that you’re not 100% sure you’ve done everything right. We’re all human and we try to be courageous. We have to have a healthy way of managing things although you don’t come into this job not to be affected. But we have a fabulous team dynamic, and we come together to talk things through, reflect and grow so that we never become desensitised.”
Eva alongside MP Liam Conlon in parliament and Director of Retail Ginger Bujdoso.
In October 2024, she was advocating for high quality palliative and end of life care in parliament, meeting MPs during Hospice Care Week.
Eva was part of a team from St Christopher’s and Hospice UK who spent a day at a pop-up charity shop in Westminster, lobbying for better funding for hospice and palliative care.
Back in her day job, and seeing the growing elderly frail population, she is determined to play an active part in broadening access to palliative care in the coming years. In addition to completing an MSc in advance practice, Eva is keen to complement the skills she uses on a daily basis.
“I really enjoy nursing and have a passion for strategy.
I feel really strongly about equitable access to good end of life care.
We will all die and we should all have the opportunity to have palliative care when we need it.
So, we need to continue to invest in our workforce and evolve services so that are ready for the demographic changes so everyone can access quality care and die well in the place they want to die.”
For the time being, Eva is committed to providing that care as best she can to all her patients. With that commitment though comes constant reflection.
“At the end of every day I have a whole spectrum of emotions. Some days it’s very sad. Other times you know you’ve made an awful situation better. You learn to separate yourself in some way because you have to, by developing a resilience to deal with what happens on a daily basis.”
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