ehospice is pleased to share a special collection of photographs from Ashgate Hospice that tell real stories about death and dying. These images, captured by the talented Billy Bye, offer a look at the experiences of our patients, as well as the incredible staff and volunteers who support them.
Talking about death and dying can be tough and even a bit uncomfortable. It’s a topic many of us prefer to avoid, but it’s so important to face it openly and honestly.
With Life’s Final Chapter, we’re inviting you into a special collection of photographs that tell real stories about death and dying. .
The photos are accompanied by the personal stories of those featured, providing a deeper understanding of the joys and challenges that come with life’s final chapter. Through their generous participation, our patients, families, and team members have allowed us to share a rare glimpse into what it means to live fully, even as life draws to a close.
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Here we meet Graham Matthews, Richard Matthews and Stephen Rumford
“The death of my wife Diane has made me realise just how precious life is – it should be lived to the fullest. I have found I am now much calmer, more positive, more rational and more reflective about many issues since she died.
“The way we respond to grief is different for everyone, in terms of reactions, timescales and coping mechanisms. I am more empathetic towards and understanding of deeper emotional situations that I encounter nowadays, more so than I was before Diane died.
“I now like to think of life as a celebration and a tribute to the people we love and remember, which has inspired me to learn drumming and join a band and perform at gigs! I also started playing football a couple of times a week and have made many friends. I also wrote a book “Diane’s Story” about my late wife and her illnesses and the challenges we faced together.
“I have become more accepting and prepared for life’s mishaps and struggles and try to be more positive about life generally.”
“Since I was diagnosed, I have come to learn that my mortality is for others to decide. Medical care and medicinal treatment are in the hands of others. You rely on the experts who are not able to achieve what you would like them to.
“I’ve come to feel frustration and regret that perhaps my living style may have not been the right one.
“And while the contact and communication you have with others is not always positive, you do your best to find the elusive answers to situations which usually turn out to be a waste of time.
“Now I only keep looking for miracles and any hope that may show its face. I have to look forward to my demise.
“I would urge others to keep talking to as many people you think may be able to smooth your daily concerns. Hang on to the slightest sign of hope and care, rise above your negative thoughts and cling onto the care you get from others.”
“Death has taught me that you can’t delay, that it is ever present, waiting there. It has taught me that it frames life and whilst not necessarily giving meaning it is true that life would be meaningless without it. Death has taught me that keeping good relationships is important, that being generous is better than its opposite and that love and harmony create ease.
“I’ve learned that if you’re lucky enough to reach an age where the burden of carrying on is greater than that of letting go, then death can be easy and desirable. Of course, none of us know what ours will be.
“I now think I love life more than I did – this could just be part of getting older but I feel it has something to do with keeping an eye on death. Not that I have a bucket list, some desires yes but not a ticking off a list. More that I want to be more present in my life, because largely I do small stuff, so if I waited just for the big things, I’d miss all of this.
“At some point it is worth remembering that death is natural, normal and inevitable and that all things from moments to empires are impermanent. A matter of hold on tightly and let go lightly I guess.”
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