Delyse Sykes (Bobby), 61, from Reading, is sharing her experiences of working in palliative care ahead of International Nurses Day (12 May) – a career path inspired by the expert and compassionate care her father received at Sue Ryder Duchess of Kent Hospice.
“I first became interested in palliative care when my father was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in 1994,” shares Bobby. “At the time, I was applying to train as a qualified nurse after spending eight years working as a healthcare assistant. I didn’t know much about palliative or hospice care—until my father spent two weeks at the Reading Sue Ryder hospice before he died. The care he received there left a lasting impression on me.”
“We were scared and upset—my dad was only in his fifties,” Bobby recalled. “But we were fortunate to be with him throughout, as he was cared for in the large family room. We were all in awe of the care, not just for my dad, but for us as a family. It was exemplary.”
“I knew he was pain-free and in good hands as he slipped away peacefully, surrounded by those who loved him. From that moment, I knew this was the kind of nursing I wanted to do. I wanted to make my dad proud,” Bobby continues.
Bobby’s connection to Sue Ryder strengthened when her children’s father was cared for by the charity out in the community, fulfilling his wish to die at home. Bobby’s daughter hosted a fundraising ball in his memory, raising around £6,000 in vital funds.
After qualifying as a nurse, Bobby was offered a role as a chemotherapy nurse—a position she went on to hold for 23 years. “While the job was closely related to palliative care, I was finally able to fulfil my dream when I became Team Lead for the Community Palliative Care team at Sue Ryder,” she said. “It meant so much to be able to use my skills and experience to provide the same compassionate care that my family and I had once received.”
Bobby continues: “Palliative care has come a long way since my dad died. More people now understand what it means, and I think death and dying are no longer as frightening as they once were. Patients and families are offered choices about their preferred place of care and where they would like to die. They’re also supported in the community, which allows them to spend quality time with their loved ones and, if they wish, to die at home.
“I’m proud to play a part in making that possible, and I look forward to continuing to help ensure that Sue Ryder can be there for families in the community when it matters most.”
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At Sue Ryder, we can’t make life’s most difficult moments easy, but we can carry some of the load. For more than 70 years, we have been a source of strength and support for anyone living with a life-limiting illness or grief.
Dying and grief are universal experiences, but too many people face them alone. We are a safe and reassuring hand you can reach for. From providing care and support for someone at the end of their life to helping someone manage their grief, we know there is no one size fits all when it comes to how we cope and the help we need. We campaign for everyone who is approaching the end of their life or grieving to have access to the right support, at the right time. And we seek to break down the barriers to talking about dying and grief – so we can all be better prepared and better equipped to be there for each other.
We can make a positive difference during even the darkest of times. Whether in the last months, weeks or days of life, or living with grief, we help people live the best life they possibly can. We are there when it matters.
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