After being told he had only days left to live, Gavin Parkes, 39, and his partner Lori, were able to have their dream wedding on March 22 at Ashgate Hospicecare, with help from the hospice staff and the generous support of local businesses. After their amazing day, the couple decided to raise money for the hospice so that more patients can receive the care they need and fulfil their dying wishes.
Gavin was diagnosed with bladder cancer just before Christmas last year, only months after Lori gave birth to their son Fletcher. Earlier this year, they received the devastating news that Gavin had a particularly aggressive form of bladder cancer, very rare in somebody of his age, and that it was incurable.
The couple had planned to get married this summer, however Gavin’s condition took a turn for the worse and he was brought onto the ward at Ashgate Hospicecare for round-the-clock specialist care. Gavin’s condition continued to deteriorate, and he was told that he might only live another few days.
Whilst on the ward, Lori expressed their wish to get married to one of the hospice Chaplains, who then rallied the staff to organise their dream wedding in just a day and a half.
Although the wedding left Gavin exhausted, he was able to join in for most of it. A few days later, with the special care and attention of the staff on the ward, he started to feel better. He said: “I was feeling very tired and dazed on the day of the wedding, I could barely stay awake. But it was an amazing day. I feel so fortunate that we were able to have our dream wedding with thanks to the staff and the local businesses that made it a reality in such a short time.
The care at the hospice has been excellent, I’ve been waited on hand and foot by the staff and volunteers! However, it’s been hard not feeling well enough to spend time with my little boy, Fletcher. When he comes to visit I’m often too tired to play with him. I’m looking forward to going home soon so that we can spend quality time together as a family.”
The wedding was held in the new sunroom built in the summer of 2018, with thanks to a generous grant from Westfield Health Charitable Trust. Local businesses provided goods and services free of charge to make the day extra special, including the bouquet, fresh petal confetti, the wedding cake, and even a vintage car.
The local Ashgate Hospicecare shop steamed the bride’s dress and groom’s suit, and a wedding buffet was quickly put together by the kitchen staff at the hospice for all the guests to enjoy.
Gavin died at the hospice last month, almost two weeks after his wedding day. The staff and volunteers at the hospice sent their sympathies to Lori and Gavin’s family at this sad time.
Lori said: “The wedding was incredible and we had an absolutely amazing day. Everything that the businesses donated was exactly what I would have chosen for our wedding. Having it in the new sunroom meant that we felt a million miles away from a clinical environment. It was simply beautiful and we will all cherish our memories from that day.
The hospice have helped us so much, not just with the wedding, but with Gavin’s care both on the ward and at home. All we want is for more people to be able to receive such a high level of care when they need it. I’ve started a JustGiving page to raise funds for the hospice and my target is to raise enough money for another patient to have their dream wedding.”
For more information visit Ashgate Hospicecare and Lori’s JustGiving page
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